WHISPERING SMITH: Cursed be he who stealeth this one away...

Chris Adam Smith

Chris Adam Smith

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No muckspout I, swearing is not a habit of mine and yet, when stubbing my toe on the bed leg as I frequently do, I let out a loud yell followed by a one-off expletive, a once in a while comforting word that has been stolen and is now used, irritatingly, by practically everyone as part of their everyday vocabulary.

Television dramas and ‘comedic’ shows, sporting personalities, Facebook, the High Street, and in public houses, it flies about anywhere stealing away every bit of comfort my lone curse gave me.

Miniature Railway at Mewsbrook Park will be up and on shakedown runs from this weekend

Miniature Railway at Mewsbrook Park will be up and on shakedown runs from this weekend

In fact it is now so commonplace that it has lost all remedial meaning and my toe still pains me.

I mentioned this to my son and he suggested the solution might be to settle upon a much less used expletive, one seldom heard but may, once upon a time, have had some therapeutic toe healing qualities.

This meant digging back in time to a childhood where swearing was never deemed appropriate, even in the toe-banging arena, and there I found it.

An archaic word seldom heard these days but acceptable I believe in the privacy of my own bedroom.

It is a medieval word in origin, a comforting substitute for that other over-used cuss word when staggering around the bedroom with tear-filled eyes, and I shall keep this one myself lest it be stolen!

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If you want to hear hundreds of ukuleles then visit the Stage by The Sea today (July 17) between 1pm to 8pm when groups from all over the region will be performing.

A free event so no excuse for not turning up.

If ukuleles are not to your liking then the Littlehampton Concert Band will be giving a concert in Mewsbrook Park from 3pm to 5pm on that same afternoon.

Support our local musicians and have a great time, bring a picnic, a blanket and sunshine – I am torn between the two.

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